Before you judge my dog’s birthday party

Last month, my oldest toy poodle, Quixote turned TEN years old! Quixote is my first dog and has boldly taught me everything I know about poodles. He is a ruthless, but effective physical therapist. He forces me to socialize in hopes of scoring treats from strangers.

Of course, I had to spoil him with the perfect gift.

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A Charmin Forever Roll! A 12” roll of toilet paper, one of Quixote’s favorite vices. At first, I wanted to order the Forever Roll for myself. Charmin offers a money-back guarantee: Go up to one month before changing your roll. As someone who endured two colonoscopies in one year, I feel like that’s a bad business plan. My mast cells love a challenge. Then I realized my blog readers would much rather see pictures of my poodle than hear about how much I pooped in a month.

Quixote’s birthday serendipitously fell on the same day as his weekly agility class, so I also threw him a birthday party. There were hats, treats, and party favors.

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I worried these Facebook photos might undermine the seriousness of my health challenges. I try not to care what people think, but unfortunately image does matter when you’re of the precipice of crowdfunding.

I know a lot people of people think dog birthday parties are ridiculous. In fact, some people believe all birthday parties are ridiculous. I have a couple words for these people:

  1. Don’t steal my joy
  2. Prepare to feel like an asshole

First of all, it cost almost nothing. You better believe I collected every half-chewed stream of toilet paper and place them in a bag by my toilet. The mini hats were on clearance, because they look absurd on humans, and the lottery tickets technically made money. The balls were less than a dollar, even though Boost the Aussie thinks they’re worth a million.

Second, I miss celebrating birthdays. In fact, I miss celebrating all occasions with others. Because of MCAS, I usually spend my birthdays and Christmas alone. I can’t go to restaurants or parties with friends and family anymore. At the same time, I need celebration more than ever to offset my health challenges. Right now, my life just feels like a series of fights and losses. Quixote’s birthday was the perfect opportunity to share joy in a safe space. Feel like a jerk, yet?

Furthermore, I’m allergic to men, babies, and baby-making. I cannot imagine how many ways childbirth would destroy my body, nor how I would take care of children when I can barely care for myself. Plus, MCAS appears to have a genetic component. Instead of wallowing in my fear that I may never be able to have kids, I am focusing on the family I do have, even if it’s not human.

Finally, my dog has helped me and continues to help me get through hard times. At first glance, his help appears self-serving. Quixote keeps me on a strict schedule of meals, bathroom breaks, and exercise. He is the reason I get up in the morning and the reason I go outside. He is the reason I regained strength in my body. He is the reason I learned how to ask for help when I need it. He is the reason I keep fighting.

P.S. I am honored to have been nominated as a WEGO Health Awards Hilarious Patient Leader. If you haven’t already, please endorse me to raise awareness for mast cell disease, EDS, and POTS!

 

6 thoughts on “Before you judge my dog’s birthday party

  1. Congratulations on your WEGO nomination Keeya! You definitely deserve it, and I just endorsed you. I love that you had a birthday party for Quixote. I’m sure all his friends at agility class were happy too. As far as the toilet paper goes…. that’s hilarious! I think people often underestimate just how much our pets help us. You’ve done a wonderful job of articulating just how much pets can add to our lives. Blessings to you!

  2. This is fabulous, and the sort of thing we do! Don’t worry about the ‘jerks’. As I seem to be seeing more and more, I don’t think people can actually understand fully unless they have been in a similar situation. Unfortunately this can make people a little short sighted. My partner and I got a standard poodle girl just over a year ago. She chose me, and she is our baby girl (probably never having children due to health issues) and such a loving, and caring soul. Both myself and my partner face our own different health issues (myself more so, including suspected mast cell). Our girl keeps us both smiling, and comforts us in the bad times. She is a complete doll, and we wouldn’t be without her. P.S- Happy Belated 10th Birthday Quixote! Hope you had a superbly enjoyable day with all your pals!

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